1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize