so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
