Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
