Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
FUCK WHALES
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