You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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