I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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