do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.