I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I love having hate sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
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