would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize