Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
She made me pour olive oil on her.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
