sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
