Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.

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(917): View more from New York City

My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand

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(316): View more from Kansas

The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Why do you think she gets more guys?

(1-603): View more from New Hampshire

well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that

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(310): View more from California

Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.

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(937): View more from Ohio

Are you feeling better yet?

(937): View more from Ohio

I need a nap and a new butthole

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