i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
