Texts From Last Night

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  (718): View more from New York

  Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up

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  (718): Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up http://tfl.nu/269s
  Replies (7) Good night (605) Bad night (3865)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.

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  (303): I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer. http://tfl.nu/2j6i
  Replies (76) Good night (15720) Bad night (1312)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle

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  (612): He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle http://tfl.nu/2q09
  Replies (13) Good night (1170) Bad night (3716)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX

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  (517): My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX http://tfl.nu/rv1c
  Replies (23) Good night (1142) Bad night (6274)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?

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  (920): Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job? http://tfl.nu/emh8
  Replies (10) Good night (2730) Bad night (1061)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line

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  (401): Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line http://tfl.nu/kpx6
  Replies (12) Good night (2909) Bad night (917)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?

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  (817): The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen? http://tfl.nu/1u3n
  Replies (8) Good night (731) Bad night (2617)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg

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  (217): Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg http://tfl.nu/vp09
  Replies (8) Good night (2435) Bad night (697)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.

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  (203): I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant. http://tfl.nu/7i15
  Replies (6) Good night (2067) Bad night (865)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie

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  (917): just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie http://tfl.nu/qsvp
  Replies (6) Good night (1282) Bad night (517)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?

  (1-662): View more from Mississippi

  In some strange universe, yes

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  (662): So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores? (1-662): In some strange universe, yes http://tfl.nu/4gql
  Replies (7) Good night (1662) Bad night (479)
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  (310): View more from California

  We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating

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  (310): We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating http://tfl.nu/6jwq
  Replies (17) Good night (923) Bad night (1557)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.

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  (781): I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks. http://tfl.nu/y7p2
  Replies (0) Good night (517) Bad night (322)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?

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  (352): He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound? http://tfl.nu/fs09
  Replies (3) Good night (1160) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  How does one un superglue their foot to the floor

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  (928): How does one un superglue their foot to the floor http://tfl.nu/7pa3
  Replies (3) Good night (230) Bad night (363)

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