Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize