I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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