there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
