Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
