On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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