Duck Duck Cougar?
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
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