Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
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being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
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NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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