Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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