i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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