Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
