that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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