I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
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she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
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we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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