i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
