So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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