Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
