That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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