We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize