i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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