I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
