Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
