Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
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He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
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More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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