i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
