sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize