Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
false alarm, still single
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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