My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
New York to be Host to Americaâ€™s Biggest Singles Event
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Kylie Jenner Wasnâ€™t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.