I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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