Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
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He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
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I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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