my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
