I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
too bad you live with your parents still
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
