Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
