What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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