Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
