was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize