She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
