Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
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