What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
